So how do you recognize you are in an abusive relationship? For that matter, what is a toxic person, and how can you see the signs of an unhealthy relationship? Why do you keep justifying the behavior of our spouse or partner when they are treating you in a way that is not loving and encouraging?
Those questions alone can cause an incredible amount of unrest in your mind, and if you are currently in or were previously in a toxic relationship, you can likely relate . You know something is wrong, you know you don't feel loved, understood, respected, and appreciated. At first everything was wonderful and then overtime, things began to change. You think it's you, and wonder what you did wrong and how you can fix it. You justify his or her reactions and think that in time it will get better, but unfortunately so often that is not the case.
My guest on the podcast today, Kim Saeed, shares her expertise in the field of healing from toxic relationships and understanding narcissistic abuse.
Kim is an internationally respected self-help author and educator specializing in recovery and rebuilding after toxic relationships. She is the founder of kimsaeed.com, a life transformation site that teaches people to flourish after narcissistic abuse. She is the author of the Kindle bestseller, How to Do No Contact Like a Boss! and is currently writing an upcoming book, The Way of the Warrior, for Balboa Press, a division of Hay House.
I truly believe that devastating situations can be catalysts for transformation if we let them. We don’t have to live lives of conformity or stay in abusive relationships. We don’t have to be victims of generational dysfunction or do things the way our parents and grandparents did them. We don’t have to hang onto dead dreams because we’ve been told we should. All of us – including you – have the power of choice.
Her resources reach 9 million people and her YouTube channel is filled with incredible content about every aspect of understanding and healing from narcissistic abuse. If you don't subscribe to her channel already, you're missing out on so much important information, presented in a way that will fill you with an empowering mindset to take back control of your life and relationships.
Kim Saeed and I discuss the following topics during our chat on the podcast:
- Some of her personal story and what inspired her to start advocating for narcissistic abuse awareness and recovery.
- How to recognize you're in an abusive relationship.
- The most important things to remember for someone who has recently left a dysfunctional relationship.
- How long-term narcissistic abuse can cause brain damage, and ways that we can begin to heal that damage.
- Advice for those who are still in a toxic relationship, and what if it involves children and shared financial responsibilities.
- The best way to go "no contact" with a toxic person. Break it off slowly or cold turkey?
My chat with Kim was an amazing experience. I was already a big fan of her work and getting the opportunity to learn more from her was something that I know I benefited greatly from and I'm sure you will too. If you know someone who is currently struggling with any of the situations we talk about, please consider sharing this with them.
It's never too late to start taking control of our life back, and protecting ourselves from further pain and damage at the hands of a narcissistic spouse, family member, friend, or boss.
-Matt Pappas, CLC, MPNLP&